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Why You Need To Be Well-Rounded (And How To Do It)
By youniqorn Posted in Emotional Health, Habits, Happiness, Hobbies, Interests, Learning, Life, Mindset, Tips on 0 Comments 40 min read
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TL;DR

  • Being well-rounded isn’t about being an expert in everything, just knowledgeable on a good number of things.
  • It’s important to focus on what you actually enjoy/matters to you personally.
  • Learn a new language
  • Watch movies/read books/consume media that enriches your life and broadens your horizon that you may have otherwise missed out on by understanding a different language.
  • Watch foreign films/animations with subtitles and skip the dubs even if you don’t want to learn the language to fluency.
  • Take up a new hobby e.g. dance, sports, painting/art, acting, improv, hiking, gardening, crocheting, volunteering, etc.
  • Meet new people frequently, especially if you have a can continuous access online and take advantage of the ease and opportunity the Internet presents. Focus on meeting and interacting with those in spaces you would visit/spend time in regardless.
  • Practice how to be a good conversationalist, especially if you’re introverted/a house permit.
  • The good news is it’s easier and less daunting than you may think, especially if the conversation is one-on-one. Listen and ask questions more so than continuously offer up information about yourself.
  • Read. A lot.
  • Watch documentaries.
  • Learn the world map and the locations of different countries and why countries came to be what they currently are and named.
  • Travel as much as you can and plan to travel more. Both locally and internationally. If you’ve never traveled internationally before, look into the requirements for visa as and travel documentation so that you are well informed before you begin your process.
  • Try new foods and learn how to cook/make the ones you love.
  • Learn how to cultivate multiple aspects of self-care.
  • Learn how to ask (questions, for help, etc.)
  • Always be curious.

 

The Nitty Gritty

Being well-rounded will serve you well through life and the power of well-roundedness cannot be overstated. Being well-rounded isn’t about being an expert in everything, just knowledgeable on a good number of things. It’s good to be knowledgeable and cognizant of sociopolitical and socioeconomic aspects of life that affect not only you but other people you may or may not interact/engage with or even meet. It gives you a better understanding of what and who else is out there and help shape your outlook, mindset, and overall experience as you navigate life and various aspects of it. Again, the point isn’t to know everything. That’s what computer databases and encyclopedias are for. Knowledge for the sake of knowledge is simply information. What you want to focus on are the things that you actually enjoy and that matter to you personally and have actual impact in your life. The things that drive and motivate you to create impact, as well.

It’s incredibly freeing and empowering to have a better scope of what and who is out there. A lot of people tend to miss out on opportunities and positive aspects of life because they are simply unaware that they exist or are ignorant of those things and, therefore, never take the leap into exploring them.

You open yourself up to more people, environments, and opportunities to grow, form healthy relationships, generate income, and have positive life experiences when you are well-rounded.

Being well-rounded also gives you a lot of confidence and allows you to become more assertive because you’re more knowledgeable and aware. The mental and emotional edge/advantage, knowledge and the confidence derived from having and understanding that knowledge gives you is cumulative and hard to measure and, therefore, overstate. In a nutshell, you’re much better off in every aspect of life being well-rounded than you’re not.

Being well-versed in not just what you’re taught in school but, as they say, “street smarts” as well, amplifies your skill-set and therefore your value and allows you far more opportunity to skyrocket your net worth and allows you the opportunities grow and become yourself.

So, how to do it?

  1. Learn a new language.

    Language is one of pillars of human existence (all organic life, really) and any society and through which humans and other animals communicate. There are so many different languages as there are nations and regions and there are different types of languages (verbal language, body language, sign language, digital language (code), touch-based language like braille, etc.). Again, it’s important to remember that your well-roundedness should actually enhance your specific life and make it better and more enjoyable so, if you’re going to make the time investment to learn a language, make sure you have every intention of actually using it to the fullest extent that you can. For instance, if you traveled to Ethiopia and fell in love with the culture, history, and people there, you may be inspired and motivated to learn Amharic (the official language of Ethiopia), which will allow you to better communicate with Ethiopian civilians and allow you the privilege of having and enjoying a more authentic and valuable, culturally-rich experience. Communicating with people in their national language is so powerful and there are few more impactful ways of connecting with and influencing a person than speaking with her, him, or them in their native tongue. If you are bi/multilingual, you understand this firsthand as there tend to be a lot of nuances and things lost in translation when switching from one language to the next and there are certain things you can’t really grasp the full extent of unless you understand context in a language. Not everything can be translated into English. So, learning another language is truly one of the best things you can do to connect with more people you otherwise would not be able on a level you would not be able to, have more access to and take advantage of career and work opportunities, increase your chances of finding love and romance because you have the ability to communicate with a person from a country different from yours, and just enhance your life, overall. Even if you don’t want to learn a particular language to fluency, simply listening to and consuming your everyday media in languages foreign to your own can help with your creativity and influence your brain and psyche subconsciously. For instance, if you ever watch anime, you may find that you much prefer watching it in Japanese with English subtitles or subtitles of your native language over watching it in English dubs. Watching anime in its original format enhances the experience as a lot cannot be equivalently/identically translated from Japanese (both language and culture) to English and in the dubbed versions, a lot gets lost in translation and context as a result and, therefore, diminishes the experience. This is true for foreign films, music, animations, books, blogs, etc. At the end of the day, even if English is the universal language at the time of writing this, there are literally hundreds of thousands of languages around and the globe and you generally do yourself a disservice of not learning at least one other. For a lot of us, knowing English is a result of assimilation and not necessarily because we love it so much or that we choose it above other languages. So, take the opportunity to make that choice for yourself and choose a language you adore and already has some sort of cognitive impact in your life.

    There are multiple apps to learn a new language. The idea can be daunting, and understandably so. But with so many technological advancements and web applications, there is really no to being intimidated. The important thing to do is to simply start. Start from the beginning and don’t try to master the language as soon as possible. You’re not going to learn a whole new language overnight. Try not to think of it as a big deal and instead focus on how exciting taking on a new adventure like this is, both right now while going into it and down the road when you will have become more advanced in the language and all the things/ways it will improve your life—like increase the number of people you meet and know (one of the pillars of skyrocketing your net worth). LingoDeer is a really good app to learn a new language. It has a great user interface with images, audio and text so that can learn in a multimedia format which makes it far more engaging and helpful in learning and retaining information, words, conjugation and all the different aspects of language. Duolingo is another popular app for language learning. Another thing you may worry about is the time commitment but, in all honesty, as long as you stay consistent, carving out and dedicating an ongoing 15 to 20 minutes a day will get you much, much further than trying to spend half the day learning a ton of new information in an attempt to master it all in just a few weeks/months. Pace yourself, take your time, enjoy the process, and have fun. It’s as much about the journey as the destination so don’t short yourself of the value get out of the learning process itself. Immerse yourself in the language of your choice/desire as much as possible. Learning Swahili, Spanish, or Igbo, for instance, is great incentive to meet and surround yourself with Kenyans, Latin Americans/Spaniards and Nigerians, respectively so that you can become used to hearing the language spoken in real-world, practical situations. This can feel daunting and intimidating, especially if you’re just starting out, but believe me, more people that not are very appreciative of others trying to learn their language/mother tongue and will one hundred percent happily oblige you and try to teach you as much as they can and encourage you to keep learning instead of making fun of you for your inevitable fumbling, uncertainty or mistakes. This is honestly the best way to learn. The sooner you become comfortable with listening to and immersing yourself in the language of your desire, the easier it will be for you to pick it up. The next best thing to that is consuming media in your new language. Reading billboard signs, scanning labels at a grocery store, listening to music, and watching TV/movies in your desired language will get you on the road to fluency much faster than using a learning app alone. This is because you simultaneously engage the creative parts of your brain as well as the cognitive when you’re consuming entertainment. You tend to attain and retain more easily because it is delivered in an enjoyable form (sensationalism, storytelling, theatrics, etc.) which is pleasurable (one of the key components of a habit, according to Atomic Habits) so you are more likely to remember what you hear/read because you link the new/learned word/phrase to a scene in a movie, a character, a melody, etc.

    Always have a translator app or dictionary to look up any new word you come by so you find out its meaning on the spot. This will give you immediate clarity and context and understanding in the moment (while it’s still fresh in your mind) so you will better retain that information.

    Again, you can watch movies/read books/consume media that enriches your life and broadens your horizon that you might have otherwise missed out on by understanding a different language. There are so many creatives and creations in the world—fantastic movies, documentaries, songs, podcasts, magazines, books, blogs, etc. that you miss out on by not understanding a language and all the precious nuances that cannot be translated by consuming a translation of that language. There are so many advantages to learning a new language that it would be a shame if you did not at least genuinely attempt to. It’s not practical to learn every language in existence so, again, pick one you feel is genuinely worth your while and close to your heart. Don’t feel pressured or inclined to learn a language just so that you can say you know one (again, information for the sake of information). That might actually ensure that you don’t stick with it because you’re not incentivized to learn for yourself and to actually, practically enhance your life.


  2. Take up a new hobby (or revisit/scale up an old one).

    Fantastic options are dance (of which there are so many more options like salsa, rumba, ballet, ballroom dancing, pole dancing, etc.) sports/physical activity (yoga, tennis, roller skating, weightlifting, etc.), painting, clay sculpting, acting, improv, hiking, gardening, cooking, crocheting, volunteering, etc. Like with a new language, this new hobby should actually enhance your life and make you happy. There is no point in carving out valuable time to do things, even recreational/extracurricular activities, that don’t bring you joy or improve the quality of your life and mental, physical, and emotional well-being. Everything you do should be intentional and for your betterment. For instance, if you have an affinity for Afro Latino culture, you may find taking up Salsa or Rumba more enjoyable than, say, ballroom dancing because the former merges physical activity with a specific culture you already enjoy as opposed to the latter if you don’t really have that much interest or incentive to learn it.
    Again, make sure the skills you learn, including social skills like dancing are actually going to be used and implemented in your real life. If you learn how to Salsa dance or Swing dance, don’t just keep those skills to yourself. Use that as incentive to attend events where the use of these skills is encouraged (like Salsa-themed night at the club, a ballroom fundraiser, etc.). Hobbies like dance and sports also have the added bonus and benefit of physical activity which encourages blood circulation and heightens endorphins which improve your mood, make you feel good and improve your overall quality of health and life. So, get to stepping, whether you’re trailblazing across the dance floor or the track. Again, pick something that makes you happy and that you feel will be worth the continued time, energy and emotional investment. This is the essence of turning your happy into your hobby.

  3. Meet new people frequently.

    Especially if you have continuous access online. Take advantage of the ease and opportunity the Internet provides you to connect with other people. The simple act of meeting and interacting with other human beings across the globe expands your own world and reality to include them and theirs, even if on a superficial level. We tend to learn about ourselves the most from our interactions with others. We learn about who we are—and, potentially, who we might want to become—from other people and how we relate to them. The more people you meet, generally speaking, the more opportunity you have to skyrocket your net worth because you are increasing the number of people know and, therefore, the odds of those who can help you get to the next level (whether that’s by offering moral support, priceless advice, financial assistance, etc.). Prioritize doing this, and focus on meeting and interacting with people in spaces (both virtual and physical) you would visit and spend time in regardless. This actually makes it much easier and far less awkward to meet new people because it feels more natural and not forced. For instance, if you want to be more productive, you can use the app, FocusMate, to get an accountability partner to keep you focused for 50 minutes at a time and, in that way, you get the opportunity to meet a new person each time you use the app who are there to essentially enhance your life by incentivizing you to be more productive. Because everyone is there for a specific purpose (getting shit done), it doesn’t feel awkward, and because there is a built-in time structure and introduction/interaction guidelines, you don’t have to make awkward small talk or feel weird about interacting with strangers or what you’re going to say. This is especially helpful if you struggle with social anxiety and have a hard time meeting people, or if you’re an introvert. This takes the weight off you and allows you to interact with someone new in a way that is beneficial to you both, gaining both the value of productivity and developing your social skills. The more you do it, like anything else, the more comfortable you become with it. On a more social/recreational level, if you frequent social media platforms like YouTube, Pinterest or Facebook, for instance, if you happen to be more of a lurker, get in the habit of leaving comments and interacting with the content creator or other viewers. Do not engage in/feed into trolling or other online negativity/toxicity. But simply engaging with people online around existing and/or new hobbies and interests has very real impact and a profound effect on you and your life, even if the environment is virtual. Again, take advantage of spaces that you already visit, learn and benefit from as you explore new ones. Chances are, these are the types of people you want to meet, anyway.

  4. Practice how to be a good conversationalist.

    Especially if you are introverted/a homebody/a house hermit. If you are any of the above, the idea of having conversations with new/unfamiliar people, particularly in larger groups, can feel daunting and actually be physically exhausting and draining. But the good news is it’s easier and less daunting than you may think, if you are strategic about it and focus on one-on-one conversations. The goal is not to force yourself into becoming someone you’re not at your core, i.e., trying to turn an introvert into an extrovert or vice versa. On a fundamental level, you are who you are and, not only is it a fruitless endeavor to try to change a fundamental aspect of your identity, but it’s also a potentially harmful way of thinking. There is nothing wrong with being introverted and it is no better or worse than being extroverted. They are simply characteristics and traits that different people possess. However, whether you are introverted, extroverted or a mishmash of both, falling somewhere between, developing your ability to communicate and hold conversations with is vital in life. This is true no matter who you are, where you’re from, or where in life you’re going. In order to be well-rounded, you need to know how to navigate other human beings and, therefore, need to know how to best interact with different people and in different situations. This allows you to establish and deepen connections with people you meet.  
    Verbal communication is how a lot of us primarily communicate, especially with multiple people, as mentioned in the first point about learning a new language. It is through this method of communication that we have the opportunity to connect and forge relationships with people and potentially create healthy, happy and heartfelt relationships with these people—and skyrocket our net worth as a result, physically, financially, emotionally and mentally. Being a good conversationalist is more so about listening and asking than continuously offering up information about yourself. You have two ears and one mouth for a reason. So, actually take the time to listen. Building the habit of listening closely actually makes you more assertive and a better judge of character (both habits of wildly successful people), so you’re even more incentivized to do so. Pay attention to not only what people say, but their body language and how they say things, as well; their expressions, animations, gestures, postures, demeanors, etc. and learn to read energy and tone. Tone and body language are extremely powerful and having a good grasp and understanding of those two core aspects of language will take you far and give you the upper hand in practically every situation. If you find yourself zoning or tuning out what a person is saying, however, it is also simply possible that there is a lack of compatibility/connection and you simply don’t vibe with that person. There is nothing wrong with this and the point is not to establish a connection with every single person you come across. That’s not going to happen so that shouldn’t be your aim. The point is to develop the highly-valuable skill set of knowing how to hold conversations (a mirror of your mind and the culmination of it at any given time) at different levels and with different types of people from different backgrounds and walks of life.

    Listening to people talk about themselves allows you more insight into not only who they are but, again, the opportunity to learn more about yourself in learning more about them. The aim is always self-improvement so that you can become yourself. Your approach to meeting and engaging with other people will affect how you do just that. However, always be polite and even if you do not connect or vibe with the person, it’s important to always be as amicable as possible and end the conversation on a good and positive note (e.g., it was nice speaking with you, thanks for sharing your story with me, I wish you all the best, etc.). Avoid delving into certain topics (generally perceived as sensitive, inappropriate, etc.) with people or groups of people you have not yet established a correspondingly appropriate level of connection—and, therefore, trust—with where you can speak about certain subject matters. Understand, also, that everyone has a different sense of humor, misunderstandings do happen, and things can get taken out of context but always do your best to be clear and precise about what you say. Also be aware of your facial expressions and animations. Resting Bitch Face is the real thing (I have first-hand, lifelong experience with it, unfortunately) and having awareness of how you appear and present yourself to other people, even/especially if it’s not how you actually are/feel, is important. This is a good example of a communication misunderstanding and, unfortunately, if you are unaware of something you do involuntarily that affects your appearance/demeanor in a negative way (like glaring, slouching, frowning, pouting, etc.)—and, therefore, do not take steps mitigate or correct it—you stand to lose potential opportunities to meet new people and, consequently skyrocket your net worth and forge healthy, happy relationships as people may find you unapproachable, unassertive, stuck up, snobbish, etc. because of your demeanor without you even realizing it. You end up missing out and not even knowing it—or why. If you realize you have Resting Bitch Face or project an unfriendly demeanor, practice smiling. Not because someone else tells you to, but to get into the habit of doing it so, over time, your facial muscles become trained into a less severe expression at rest and a more positive one even when you’re not smiling.
    The act of smiling also has the added, invaluable benefit of actually making you happy, even if you’re smiling for no reason at all. And, as we’ve discussed before, happiness is the central pillar of success. If you are self-conscious about your smile, investing in dental care (orthodontics, teeth whitening, gum contouring, etc.) is a worthwhile investment. Yes, investment and not expenditure/expense because your smile is probably your single best visual asset and allows you to more easily connect with people and forge relationships (that will allow you to skyrocket your net worth). A smile is universally understood and, in many ways, mankind’s global language. So, if you don’t learn any other language, learn this one 😊.

  5. Read a lot.

    I can’t overstate just how much reading expands your mind and your horizons. It exponentially develops your creativity and imagination and opens up your conscious outlook as well as your subconscious psyche to things you may never have come across otherwise. Your brain literally forms new neuron pathways when you are exposed to something new. So, the more you know, the smarter you become. Literally. Make it a habit to read as reading is a very different way of consuming and processing information than watching TV or even listening to music. Each type of media format has its advantages that make it unique from anything else, but reading tends to be quite powerful because, unlike sounds or images (still or moving), your brain has to interpret and visualize the text that you read and conjure up its own imagery based on your own perceptions, experiences and outlook in life. Based on your own unique imagination and mindset. The way you process written words and written text in a novel Is very different from the way you process images and dialogue in a movie. In a way, when you process words, your interpretation of them is your own creation. But when you see images and dialogue in a movie, those things have already been created and interpreted (basically chosen) for you to simply accept. It is essentially the difference between cooking and cutting up your own steak with a fork and knife versus being spoon-fed off-the-shelf mashed potatoes. Reading a lot is one of the habits of widely successful people and if you want to be one of those people, it is in your best interest to adopt the habit and do so now.

    Get into the habit of reading as much as possible and carving out a dedicated amount of time every day or every week to do it and do it consistently. If you need to hold yourself accountable, joining book clubs or reading challenges will give you the opportunity to engage in reading as a social activity (as it can sometimes be quite isolating because of the nature of the activity itself) but also encourage and incentivize you to stay the course and share your thoughts on what you read with others. This exponentially enhances the experience, and getting insight and opinions of other people’s interpretations of the same thing that you read will give you a different vantage point an opportunity to learn things you may not have thought about or overlooked and will also give other people the opportunity to learn from your unique thought process. Offering your input into a community of like-minded folks and getting constructive output from it is truly priceless and the value from that alone cannot be overstated.

    Read wide and read varied. Read fiction to spike your creativity and imagination so that the kid in you never stops dreaming big. Read nonfiction and self-help books for your betterment, self-development and to aid you in your journey to becoming yourself and living your best Youniqorn life. There are so many resources for amazing books and reading material; your personal resource book page, (Eme)nded, your local library, Amazon’s Kindle Unlimited and, if you prefer more socially-structured reading environments, sites like (Eme)nded, Wattpad and apps like WebToon are great options.


  6. Watch documentaries.

    Documentaries (particularly on nature and history) are quite educational as well as entertaining. They are one of the best examples of infotainment (a blend of information entertainment). Netflix has a good number of documentaries, as do other streaming services like YouTube, National Geographic, History Channel, and Hulu. This allows you to easily learn about things you did not know, including but not limited to social matters and paradigms, environmental challenges, unsung/forgotten aspects of history, etc. and how they connect with our modern lives. Documentaries on the food and medical industries in the United States, for instance, have been quite eye-opening for a lot of people and actually served as major catalysts for driving a significant percentage of the population to become more health-conscious and cognizant of what’s going both into and on top of their bodies. This has made a substantial number of everyday folks more aware and educated about their role, power and responsibility in consumerism at large and this has, in turn, placed a level of pressure on companies and producers as they are held to a higher standard of operation and more accountable for what they put out onto the market than ever before. This is a good, efficient way to become informed on issues or deepen your understanding of things you already know so that you’re more aware and can hold your own in conversations about them if/when they come up.

  7. Learn the world map.

    You live on this planet with billions of people who reside in varied parts of it. This is why a lot of us learn geography at some point in school. But you need to take it a step further, not just to memorize/cram the deets of a map, but truly learn the locations of different countries and continents in relation to each other, even if you’ve never been outside of your country, city, town or state. It is worth your while to know and visualize the fact that there is a larger world out there and knowing the names of the places that make up the world is a great, practical way to become well-rounded and broaden your mind and horizon. It is also worth your while to learn how and why countries came to be what they currently are (i.e., their areas—shapes/outlines/borders—and names). This is particularly true for the African continent. Learning about this will lead you to deeper insight about history and, at its core, human behavior. As they say, history has a way of repeating itself. It is also interesting to learn the world map in relation to what it’s looked like over various points of the Earth’s existence and to think about what it might look like long after you’re gone. Even from an imaginative point of view, you can gain a lot of appreciation for aspects of the world’s geography like plate tectonics (the slow but sure shifting of continental landmasses over time) and changes in sea levels (oceanic crust) that results in mind-blowing occurrences like mountains submerged deep under water, etc. If nothing else, knowing the different countries and their names (and even the meaning of their names) gives you a sense of just how many people, traditions, values and cultures make up our global society and gives you a better appreciation for each nation’s unique position and contribution to the world and all it entails. You can buy or print out the world map and hang it on your wall where you can see it all the time so that it’s easier to learn and visually memorize different countries. This might actually incentivize you to act on our next point, which is…

  8. Visit different countries.

    Following from the previous point, in learning about different countries of the world map, travel as much as you can and plan to travel more, both locally and internationally. Traveling is one of the core activities you can do that will truly broaden your horizons and make you tremendously well-rounded. There’s nothing quite like intentionally journeying to a location different from the one(s) you are used to and experiencing the reality of that environment through its people, culture, food and history. While you can, without a doubt, be mentally transported to a different place and/or time through a book, image, movie, or song, no amount of media consumption can substitute or replicate the authentic involvement of being physically present in another country, town or city. No matter how many blog/social media posts you read or documentaries you watch about Zanzibar, for instance, you will never truly know just how breathtaking it is until you literally take yourself there and experience everything it has to offer firsthand. For more details on traveling, read Why You Should Travel (and How to Do It Easily), but if you’ve never traveled internationally before, look into the requirements for visas, medical records, and other travel documentation for your specific nationality so that you’re well-informed before you begin your process. To start, however, make a list of three countries you would love to visit the most and use markers or push pins on your world map to mark them so that you see them every day and your brain is consistently reminded that you need to visit those places. You will both consciously and subconsciously act toward this, creating habits and systems toward reaching your target. If you do not have a passport already, your next step will be to apply for one. Having the passport in hand creates a higher sense of urgency to use it because, while they do last a while, they still expire so you’re more incentivized to use them in the time frame that they’re issued for (usually 5 to 10 years). While that is a generous window, it is still, like your time in general, a limited one and gives you a time frame and sense of urgency to act on it than not having any timeframe at all. You are more likely to take the steps to travel sooner than later when you actually begin the process of getting your ducks in a row (things in order) to do so.

  9. Try food from different places in the world.

    For instance, if you travel to Nigeria, Somalia, Ethiopia, Korea, or India, come across and become enamored with fufu and egusi stew, Somali rice, injera and doro wat, japchae, or biryani, respectively, it’s in your interest to patronize businesses of women and men of those nationalities/cultures where you live if/when possible, particularly when it comes to eateries like restaurants, food carts, grocery shops, etc. Take it a step further, and even learn how to cook, prepare, or make the dish(es) you end up really loving yourself at home. This gives you the added, fundamental skill set of knowing how to cook (i.e., feed yourself) with the gravy on top—no pun intended—of the empowerment of being able to make something you thoroughly enjoy (a superior act of self-care). This cannot be trivialized or overstated because you improve and heighten your aptitude in an aspect of life as essential as food. Food is integral to all living beings and is the central pillar of not only society, but life at large. A huge part of any human culture is their food and the appreciation of a particular dish/cuisine is a symbol of appreciation of the culture the dish originates from. Use YouTube to learn from people all over the world who take the time to share and teach how to make different dishes and types of cuisine from their respective countries, nations and cultures. You can learn a whole lot from YouTube, and it’s empowering to actually take the steps to try out different recipes from different parts of the world and have the dual experience of consuming a variety of food and developing the ability to make them. In a lot of ways, that develops your sense of both multiculturalism and open-mindedness (one of the habits of wildly successful people), as well and makes you significantly more well-rounded. This is also great incentive to learn how to cook if you don’t already or to try your hand at it, which is a vital life skill to have.

  10. Learn how to practice and cultivate multiple aspects of intentional self-care.

    The emphasis here is multiple and intentional. Acts of self-care are not just important, but vital and fundamental. When you choose to put the time and effort into taking care of yourself, it shows that you value yourself and put celebrity on and think highly of yourself, your time (your most valuable asset) and the person you want to become—as you should. It is necessary to actively practice self-care as part of your lifestyle as a Youniqorn in order to improve your quality of life and overall well-being. This is a core aspect of becoming yourself and, therefore, being well-rounded. All the above points and suggestions are acts of self-care because their purpose is to improve your quality of life and enhance your (mental, physical, emotional) well-being. However, consistently incorporating and practicing smaller, everyday acts like doing a DIY manicure and pedicure, grooming your eyebrows and lashes, practicing yoga or meditation for 15 minutes, soaking in a bubble bath once a week, deep conditioning your hair, etc. go a long way in feeling good about yourself, your body, and reinforces your self-worth because you take the time to pay attention to yourself and intentionally carve out time just for you. These little things may seem simple on the surface, but they have a powerful, compounding effect—like anything you do consistently—and pays dividends in ways you can’t imagine. Whether we realize it or not, we make time for the things that are important to us. So, you should make the time (your most valuable and limited asset) for the person who should be most valuable to you; the person you want to become. Writing down your most important and enjoyable aspects of caring for yourself (in a Self-Care or Habits Journal) will allow you hone in on what you want to make the most time for consistently. Having three or four things you can focus on is better than trying to do or practice everything. You are likely to be more consistent and look forward to practicing three aspects of self-care on an ongoing basis. You should log each experience/repetition in your self-care journal each time. Recording your acts of self-care itself should become a habit. You can also do video or audio recordings of the experiences and acts of self-care while you do them so that you can look back on/have reference point for what it looks like to care of yourself consistently. Practicing self-care truly enhances and elevates your emotional and mental health which are linked to every other aspect of your health (physical, financial, etc.). It will always serve you to feel good about yourself, as per “The Happiness Advantage” so it only makes sense that you do something good for and prioritize taking care of yourself on a consistent basis. I mean, if you don’t, who will?


    In your pursuit of taking care of yourself, however, please do not fall into the trap a lot of us tend to in feeling like you have to be entirely self-reliant/sufficient. One of the best ways to be well-rounded is to

  11. Learn how to ask (questions, for help, for guidance, for advice, etc.).

    Asking is difficult for a lot of us because, as humans, we like to feel like we can do it all and are capable of doing for ourselves without having to rely on anyone else to survive and/or thrive. This is especially true for women who have been historically and universally forced to depend on men for practically everything by default. However, social conditioning and history aside, there is no shame and, therefore, should be no guilt or any other negative emotion associated to the act of asking. Ask for help when you need it. Ask for help even when you don’t. That is a part of practicing your femininity as discussed in The Three Es of Pretty Power. For instance, even if you are perfectly capable of opening a door for yourself, if a man is in sight, politely ask for him to open it for you, anyway (or don’t decline/refuse the gesture if it is offered without your solicitation). This is also a great form of self-care and it allows you to alleviate yourself of the burden of the mindset that you have to do everything/can only rely on yourself and, therefore, everything is on your shoulders. Seriously, you’re not Atlas (and even homeboy eventually shrugged). That is far too much pressure to carry and a lot of us do so without even knowing it sometimes. You are not expected to do everything by yourself. As a matter of fact, you will generally function better, be happier and more successful when you allow other people to help you, assist you, and do (nice) things for you. Do not be afraid to ask for help when needed. Again, I have to reiterate that because a lot of us struggle with this and, if you find yourself in that position, it is absolutely worth actively working on so that you get to a place where you are more comfortable—or at least a little less resistant each time—to ask a stranger for directions, to ask a colleague for help assembling a shelf, to ask a friend for financial assistance, or to ask someone who is where you want to be for advice. In truth, the only thing in this life you don’t need to ask for is permission to become yourself. Other than that, ask away.


    Finally, following from the previous point,
  12. Be curious. Always.

    Ask questions. Ask why. Ask how. Ask when. Ask what. Asked what if. Ask and ask some more. Always be hungry to find out what you don’t know and more about what you do know—or think you know. Be curious about other people. Other places in the world. Be curious about what else is out there. What isn’t. Be curious about learning more and finding/creating opportunities to enhance your financial growth and status, to improve your physical health, to heighten your emotional state and to optimize your mental health. Always be curious on how to better yourself. Always be curious on different ways to be happy. Curiosity may have killed the cat, but satisfaction damn sure brought it back. A life lived without curiosity is hardly a life lived at all. Marvel at life and all it entails for you. You should always retain wonder in your heart and in your mind. Never lose your sense of it or allow others to dilute it, and continue to think and dream with the curiosity of a child.



    By actively practicing the above steps, you are sure to be well-rounded and enhance your life exponentially as a result. So, to recap, learn a new language, take up a new hobby/revive an old one, meet new people frequently, practice how to be a good conversationalist, read a lot, watch documentaries, learn the world map, travel as much as you can, try (and learn to cook) different foods from around the world, practice multiple aspects of self-care, learn how to ask, and always stay curious. ♥

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